In reflecting on my recent ADHD diagnosis, I’ve started to recognize some of the tools I already had in my mental toolbox that have helped me without me knowing. One of them, weirdly, has been my approach to style.
As a woman, it always felt cliché to care about what I wore or how I presented myself. It wasn’t until I thought about how much I actually used style as a strategy that I realized it wasn’t frivolous at all. For example, at the beginning of my career I looked younger than my age and so was drawn to sharply-cut workwear in order look more authoritative and “mature.” After a particularly bad breakup in my 20s, I bought brightly colored pieces that didn’t match because I wanted to make a statement and feel in control again. Following panic attacks, I’d put on my most comfortable pants in an effort to make everything feel less uncomfortable.
So, long before I knew what I was doing and way before my diagnosis, I used my style to not only feel empowered but also calm and comfortable with minimal effort.
30 seconds or less
My current mantra for my personal style is what I call “30 seconds or less”: I need to decide what to wear and/or actually get dressed in around half a minute. I used to think I made this up due to being lazy (a common misconception of people with ADHD). But as I’ve learned more about my ADHD, I realized that my need to build a wardrobe this way was rooted in a need to reduce stress triggers and stimuli – not laziness. Much like I assemble food into meals to minimize anxiety when it comes to cooking, this approach helps me leverage my attention span when it comes to what I wear.
My style is now a tool that serves me and my particular lifestyle and needs. Practically, this means I invest in good basics, I’m drawn to neutrals and classic shapes, and I love multi-purpose pieces that I can wear in a variety of situations. Capsule wardrobes are particularly appealing to me because they’re simple, reliable, and I don’t have to spend a lot of time thinking about them. Plus, as an expat who works remotely full-time, having a multi-functional wardrobe that encourages me to wear “real clothes” every day and that I can easily take with me anywhere just makes sense.
Here are examples of some pieces that have helped me on this journey.
1. Shift and sheath dresses
Shift dresses tend to be cut more loosely while sheath dresses are a bit more form-fitting. Both make getting dressed in under 30 seconds an absolute breeze: you slip on the dress, put on season-appropriate shoes, and boom. And with the right layers and accessories, you can wear both styles pretty much year-round, which is a major plus.
These were my hero pieces when I went to an office everyday (as you can tell by the office bathroom backdrop in the pictures below). I also definitely wore them to weddings, baby showers, and other events requiring me to look vaguely put together.
2. Jumpsuits
Honestly, getting dressed hasn’t been this easy since we wore actual onesies as babies. Depending on the material, you can literally wear them anywhere. And now that they’re finally being made in different lengths and more inclusive sizes, jumpsuits are no longer for just one body type.
Also, I got married in one (at left). So there’s that.
Are you headed back to work in a more formal office and worried that jumpsuits won’t fly? Find one that looks like a blouse tucked into pants and top with a blazer if needed.
3. Joggers
Some believe joggers represent the key to humanity’s destruction in the robot apocalypse because they symbolize that we’ve already given up. But joggers have existed in some form or another for over 100 years, so apocalypse or not, they have staying power.
To me, they’re perfect because they’re so darn versatile. Yes, you can wear them to the gym or to bed, but they come in dress pant fabric as well. Which, in my mind, makes them perfectly acceptable for any and all dress-pant-required situations.
I got this pair (at right) from Uniqlo years ago and they’ve been the Goldilocks of joggers: they’re not too casual thanks to their material, and they’re not too formal thanks to the hidden elastic waistband – they’re “just right.”
Make it work
At the end of the day, filtering my wardrobe using “30 seconds or less” has given me one more way to simplify my environment, ultimately helping me calm my brain so I can focus on other things.
To me, utilizing your style as a tool to help you live the life you want isn’t silly or stupid – it’s smart. It can save you time and money, give you flexibility, and allow you to focus on other things in need of your valuable brain energy. It will look different for different people, since we all have different needs, lifestyles, and motivations. And it’s not just women who can do this – if you’re a human who wears clothes, style is for you.
What are some ways you’ve used your style as a tool or strategy to help you with something? How did it make you feel? Tell me in the comments!
